Reflection |Indigo|

[wolf]

Wolf’s brown tabby body wound expertly around the obstacles in the woods, whether they be fallen trees, boulders, or other felines. He didn’t seem to be in a rush, yet he wasn’t taking his time either. He went at a speed that could be compared to jogging. He stared straight ahead of him with gold eyes, and saw the occasional small animal that he would normally hunt scampering for cover from his unforgiving paws as they thumped on the ground, finding a good path through the woods without actually thinking about it. He knew that he should probably stop and take the time to hunt for these small creatures, his stomach was actually screaming at him to do so, but he just didn’t want to stop his journey through the woods for that.

After his experience at the old road, he had accidentally stumbled upon a dump where the humans threw away their garbage. Wolf had stood, transfixed, as he seemingly watched the garbage decompose. Or, at least, that’s what it had looked like. In actuality, it had brought back painful memories, memories that made his heart ache. He had failed the only cat he had ever loved so miserably at a dump that looked identical to that one. Like an ocean wave, the memories had engulfed him, suffocating him. An almost healed wound torn open again.

He needed to get out of there. That was the only thing that he could think clearly about. Away. He needed to get away. He had ran blindly towards a random direction. It was probably a miracle that he didn’t collide with anything on his way. Eventually, his muscles that had been softened from the many months he had spent as a prisoner to humans had forced him to stop. When he did, he calmed down a bit, gaining control of himself. What was going on with him? He couldn’t look at anything without being reminded of her. His ears twitched with annoyance at that. He was stronger than this. He had already been in a deep depression for a while, and he was just now starting to get back to his normal self. But, his depression wouldn’t go away for a while. He would probably be depressed and in a foul mood for a long while yet. He would just, at least, be willing to talk to someone other than himself.

And now, as he slowed down his pace to a walk, he decided that he might as well eat something. He was nearly exhausted. He used to be able to run for much longer than this, but now… He shook his head. He needed to get back on task. He just hoped that his hunting skills hadn’t been forgotten. They would probably be rusty, sure, but he could probably still catch something, at least. Wolf’s senses tuned in almost immediately to a rustling sound not too far from him. Judging by experience that it was probably a mouse, he crept soundlessly towards the sound. He was upwind from the creature, but that didn’t matter, because the mouse was totally focused on finding food, not paying attention to anything else. He could see it now. ’Just a bit closer…’ He thought, and then, when his instincts screamed at him to pounce, he did so, and quickly killed his prey. A mouse, just like he had thought. He quickly devoured it before moving on in a slow pace. He should take a break soon, he thought, and perhaps find a place to spend the night.

Not soon after his successful hunting trip, Wolf’s ears picked up a somewhat familiar sound. He knew he had heard it before, but he just couldn’t think of the name of it. It was a kind of… rushing sound. He racked his brain for the name, as he could now picture the thing in his head. It was blue, with sparkling creatures inhabiting it, and foliage on either side. It was shallow on the edges but deeper the farther you waded in. Then, just as he realized the name, he saw it. ’A stream,’ He thought, and padded towards it.

He sat down at it’s edge and watched as he saw the fish dart away from his reflection. Not really interested, he focused his eyes on his reflection, and noticed the pitiful state he was in. He was a lot thinner than when he had last seen his reflection. He was dirty and his paws had dried blood matted on them. His ears went back. He looked like the stereotype stray. The kind that would be the bad guys in the stories his mother told him as a kit. Then his father would come and protect his mother and his siblings, and then he would get them all food to eat. He started to clean himself, starting with his paws. He really didn’t want to go around looking like some cat who didn’t care about his appearance, even if nobody knew who he was.

So progress report:
I am missing you to death.

Lyrcs: I Slept With Someone in Fall Out Boy and all I Got Was this Stupid Song Written About Me by Fall Out Boy

[/blockquote]

[Indigo Wintertrap]

We are more than just good friends
This is how the story ends

The lithe orange tabby she-cat slipped through the woods, a faint shadowy presence hidden amidst the foliage and bird calls that surrounded her presence. Amused by her vivid mental descriptions of the world around her, Indigo Wintertrap sped up into a trot. It felt so good to be better! She wanted to sing it to the trees, the hills, the sky, the mountains... whoever would listen and many more. It wasn't her very first time out and about since leaving the old lady's house but finally she was perfectly healed. She'd been in fairly good shape when she'd met Osprey but still a bit sore. Now... now she felt fully healthy and completely perfect. She laughed, a soft laugh, and sped up, letting her paws carry her through the trees and woodland. It felt so good to run.

It were the days like this that made her fully appreciate her life as a stray. The total freedom of being able to do whatever she wanted. But it wasn't just freedom. That was a word that cats, especially strays - herself included - used too frequently. Being a stray wasn't necessarily obtaining freedom - housepets that chose to remain pets could still enjoy "freedom", couldn't they? Being a stray was all about, in Indigo's mind, independence. Being able to do whatever she wanted, having no ties to a certain place... or a certain someone. She guiltily ignored the last thought, pushing it away as she began to run faster, forcing a laugh. She didn't want to think about it this morning. Besides, she hadn't done anything wrong. Her and Ash were meant to be together. She just needed to clear her head first.

The sweet scent of the stream flooded into her nostrils and Indigo smiled. She loved water, strangely enough. The forest around her looked familiar, she noted suddenly. When had she... As she came out of the woods and padded to the bank of the stream, a small gasp caught in her throat. She'd been here before! It had been much colder and the stream had been iced over but she recognized it all the same. This was where Stellar had taught her how to fish! ... And she'd ignored him and then got bitten by one. Well, stung really but now whenever she told the story it was always "bitten". It just sounded so much more exciting and unusual. Nostalgia flooded her senses and she sunk to the ground, inhaling the sharp scent of grass to try and calm herself.

Everything had been simple back then. She'd been a new stray to the streets and she'd met Stellar in the woods - the same woods where she'd met Ash, she realized with a start - and he'd took her out here to go fishing. She'd flirted with him and developed a little crush but it had all been playful and fun. She missed that. She missed Stellar. Sooner or later she needed to find him and fix things between them. He was still a friend. He probably would have been more if she hadn't met Ash. If she hadn't met Ash... The idea was scary and uncomfortable but also... simple. Life would have been much less confusing without him.

She rose to her paws, feeling a nagging guilt in the pit of her stomach for even thinking that. It was true but... she was horrible. After all she'd put Ash through... After all the times he'd proved himself to her. She shook her head, feeling a familiar wave of disgust. No. No no no! She was not going to slip back into depression so easily just because she'd made on teensy little slip-up - had one horrible little thought. She recognized that it was ungrateful to the extreme and it wouldn't happen again. She gulped. That had been so close. Too close.

Her eyes swept over the stream as it wound away from her. Anything to distract herself. Ooh! There was a cat! A tabby like herself, but brown not orange. And a guy. Just like Stellar, her little voice chirped in the back of her head. "Not helping," Indigo grumbled as she began to weave down through the reeds and over to the tom to say hello. Isn't talking to yourself like the first sign of insanity? "Shut up, you." She rolled her eyes. Of course, hearing voices is also pretty high on the list. Indigo stopped with a sigh. She was not going to dignify that with a response. Not that it was an actual conversation or anything. Her cynical conscience was just making comments - she was making comments. The conversation was with... herself. She shook her head, grinning amusedly. No, there really was no justification.

Hey," she chirped casually as she got nearer to the tom, shooting him a grin. What was she doing anyway? she wondered. It was as if she had this crazy anal little need to go introduce herself and say hello to every random cat she saw. Well say hello at least. Introductions weren't always important - especially not when she had met Ash, she reminisced with a small smile. "I'm Indigo Wintertrap." Hmm. Maybe that did make up part of the anal thing. No, not anal. She was just friendly. That's all there was too it. She grinned. If you say so...

OOC: Haha I definitely figured this post was only going to be like two paragraphs lol. Turns out I have more Indigo-muse than I thought Probably cause I haven't rped her in a while.

[wolf]

The brown tabby tom unconsciously slipped into a rhythm of the strokes of his tongue over his paw. This repetitive task made him, just as unconsciously as when he had started the rhythm of tongue strokes, get distracted by his own thoughts. He sleepily thought about attempting to catch one of the shimmering creatures that danced in the stream. He tried to devise a way of going about this. He inferred that the fish would always dart away when his shadow was cast over the water, as it was now. He would have to cross the stream and position himself in such a way that his shadow was safely behind him, away from the water. And then what?

This question stumped him. The meal was so close, and yet, he doubted he could be fast enough to stick his paw in and hook it, and he definitely could not lunge at them with his teeth. No, he would have to find another way. He would have to anticipate the fish’s pattern of movement, estimate at what time it would be within reach, and then… Something. He hit a road block. He started to get annoyed at this problem in his plan. How was he actually going to spear one of those darting fish? The answer seemed to dart away from him, just as these creatures did with seeming ease.

Wolf abandoned trying to clean himself. What he had in mind would probably do most of the job anyway. He stood up and waded across the stream, getting soaking wet. But really, the cool water was a relief from the summer sun. So he didn’t mind it too much, even if it clung to his fur and made him heavier. He climbed out of the stream on the other side and, not stopping to try and get some of the water out of his brown and sable pelt, he became transfixed on the stream. He was perched just at the edge in a hunter’s crouch, one paw out experimentally, almost over the water, but not quite. His gold eyes spotted a fish coming closer to him, and he locked onto it. He tried to become one with the fish, deciding where he should go, what path to take through the blue. And then…

His paw whipped out at the spot that Wolf had predicted the fish would be at that moment. He tried to hook into the fish with his claws, but his paw became strangely heavy in the water and lost the momentum it needed to stab through the fish. His other claws unsheathed and dug into the moist dirt around the stream in frustration. Oh well, this was only his first try. He sat down by the stream and stared into it’s depths as he thought through the problem logically. How could he maintain enough power behind his paw to hook onto the fish and drag it out…

As his mind wrapped around this problem, he didn’t notice the other cat until she started saying something. Surprised, his head snapped up and his gold eyes locked onto her. The situation immediately reminded him of when he was at the road and he hadn’t noticed the cats there either until they had spoken. There must be something wrong with him. Stumped by these mindless, but swift, creatures in the stream and allowing other cats to creep up on him when they weren’t even trying to conceal themselves, and then showing his surprise like a billboard around his neck. It was amazing what traumatic events combined with being confined in small spaces could do to a once tough stray cat like Wolf Sharpstone.

While she was talking, Wolf wondered how he should respond. He wanted to be friendly, but he really still felt miserable about everything. The fish problem had been a pleasant distraction from the things that were bothering him to wits end, however, he was still in an irritable mood. You wouldn’t want to make Wolf angry now, that was for sure. ”Hello,” he said, but the fact that he was forcing kindness was all too apparent in his voice and the way his body was positioned. He was sitting by the stream, his fur still soaked, completely tense and on high-alert, as if he was determined to make up for his past mistakes of not noticing felines, or any other creature for that matter, until they were shouting in his face.

He sighed at his failed attempt and dropped the act. He might as well just be in a foul mood and take it out on this innocent cat who was just being nice. Who would be nice to someone who looked like Wolf, anyway? Soaking wet, dirty, bloody? It was insanity. ”What do you want?” He snapped, and his ears twitched ever so slightly at his own tone of voice. He almost felt guilty about taking out his misery on this young female. Almost.

[/blockquote]

What if I don't want to be saved?
This makes me afraid.

Lyrics: Afraid by Yellowcard

[Indigo Wintertrap]

Well I never saw it coming
Should have started running

Why was she here anyway? What had brought her here of all places? With a slight start, Indigo realized that this would also be fairly close to where Stellar had taught her to hunt. Where they'd spent the afternoon with Storm and Tamar. Wherever they were now - she hadn't seen either of them in a while. She had had something good with Stellar. Maybe she'd been too quick to dismiss it, maybe she'd under-rated it in the moment. No! Her eyes widened and she glanced around guiltily, as if expecting to see some thought-reader close by. She rolled her eyes. She was allowed to think, wasn't she? And she wasn't running away from Ash and back into Stellar's arms... she was just makign sure she had made the right decision. It was only fair to Ash...

Yeah, he's sure lucky to have a girl like you, she thought sarcastically, rolling her eyes. But, that wasn't really true. She wasn't all that bad was she? Personally, she thought Ash deserved much much better but he had already decided that he wanted her. Indigo had never thought of herself as the unfaithful, cheating type. She wasn't! She was just conflicted. She was so young and... she loved Ash but - She wasn't ready to be his mate. To be Indigo Firestar. She wrinkled her nose unconsciously. She wanted to be with Ash and she did think that he was "the one" for her, but she still wasn't ready to commit to him. She wasn't even two years old yet. Though her birthday was approaching soon, she realized with a devilish smirk. Fun fun fun.

Anyway, hadn't she left to clear her head? To focus on getting better emotionally and trying to piece herself together? Not to get even more messed up by wondering if Stellar was the one of her. And he wasn't. She frowned. But surely stuff like that was important too. Important, but maybe past. It was too late for those kind of worries, after everything she'd put Ash through. Indigo sighed. It was all getting so confusing. Being with Ash had seemed like the simplest, easiest thing in the world. But beneath th pretty exterior, there was more to it. Just like herself, she thought with a small grin.

So this new tom, though. The brown tabby. He was certainly... untalkative, Indigo thought with a small grin as he made a one-word greeting. Two syllables though. No, she was being meaning. In all likelihood, he was wondering why the hell she had bounded over and introduced herself. It wasn't like she was looking for the perfect guy or anything. She'd already found him, she reminded herself. But then why did she feel those butterflies every time she thought of their situation. And not the good kind. Well, of course. There was no good kind. But they were okay. It just meant that she still was tingly around Ash. She loved him, for godsakes.

The harsh snap from the tom cut into her thoughts and Indigo blinked, eyes widening in surprise at his discordant tone. "Excuse me?" she managed in disbelief. How rude! "I was trying to be friendly but I guess I shouldn't waste my effort somewhere where they're so obviously going to be useless!" She narrowed her eyes, seething silently. Stupid jerk. Why was he so angry anyway? Probably one of those angry-by-nature cats. Bad past, now hates the world kinda thing. Depressed? Indigo felt a bit guilty for her outburst. "Don't take out your problems on me," she muttered defensively with a bit of a pout. But she didn't move.

Long long time ago

[wolf]

The brown tabby was wondering what had compelled the feline in front of him to come to this stream. He had wandered up here by chance, nothing guiding him to this location except for the thought to get away from the garbage dump. He had fled from there like a coward from death in battle, as if death itself were chasing him, licking his paws as he sprinted away, blindly running… Was this how he was going to be, now? Running away from every little set back life decided to throw at him? Like a coward? He was stronger than this, he had told himself over and over, but this provided little comfort to him. He still felt the fresh pain, no matter what he told himself.

Wolf had to make a decision. Either he could spend the rest of his life dwindling over past events that he had no power or control over to change, or he could just move on. For a while, he had chose the aforementioned, but now, he wasn’t sure. He felt that if he chose the latter, it would be like a betrayal to the one cat he had loved, like he was stabbing her in the back. And he couldn’t do that… He didn’t want to hurt her. Again. He felt that moving on with his life would be selfish. He owed it to Daisy to mourn her for a long while yet. To him, it was a sort of atonement for failing her when she needed him.

He sighed at his indecision. Couldn’t the answer ever just be presented to him on a silver platter? But no, nothing in life was ever that simple or straight-forward. He would be left to decide this one on his own, without the help of anyone or anything. There was no way in hell that he was going to tell anyone about his problems. The only thing that Wolf would gain from that is somebody who knew where his strength faltered. Give someone leverage over him like that? Please. Talking about it, to him, was one of the worse things he could do.

He realized that the orange tabby had started speaking again. What was her name? He tried to remember as she started telling him off. Like he cared about what she was yelling about at him. Something about wasting someone’s time. Wolf took a stab at it and inferred that he was the one wasting her time. Oh well. She was the one who had snuck up on him. He could say the same thing to her. She had interrupted his problem with the fishing, and now she was wasting his time by telling him off.

What she said next completely shocked Wolf. He actually winced. Was he that easy to read? Could she read him as if he were a book? He stared at her. Her words had completely shocked him into submission. The words just tumbled out of his mouth before he could catch him. ”I… I’m sorry,” He stuttered, a look of complete shock on his face. He quickly gained control of himself, though, and recovered, the look of indifference back on his face in a few seconds. How could she had known what he was thinking? What he’d been through? How was it that she knew to say that?

He took a deep, tentative breath to calm down. There was no way that this cat was a mind reader. That was absolutely insane. Cats can’t read minds. He quickly ruled out a few other possibilities. She couldn’t have followed him, no matter how oblivious he had been at first to her presence. He swallowed hard, still shaken by this. How could she have known the one thing to say to get his attention… And then, a bigger problem. Was he really taking out his anger, frustration, and his problems on other cats? Was that what he was doing? He thought back to his other encounters. Yes… That was what he was doing. And this realization unsettled him even more. It was like he had sealed himself off from the rest of the world, hissing and clawing at anyone who tried to disrupt the false sense of security he had constructed himself.

Wolf took a sharp intake of breath. That was exactly what he had been doing. He had boxed himself in, and whenever something disrupted him, he would run, or make it go away. Just as he had been trying to do with this cat. Make her go away. Now he understood. He was afraid of anyone getting into his sealed-off corner of the world and hurting him again. He had wondered why he didn’t want to talk to anyone anymore, why he was so afraid to talk to anyone else. He understood. ”How… Did you know?” He asked, and tightly wrapped his tail around him.

I could learn to pity fools as I'm the worst of all
And I can't stop feeling sorry for myself.

[/i][/right]

Ooc:
Lol… breakthrough! XD

Lyrics: Don't You Know Who I Think I Am by Fall Out Boy

[Indigo Wintertrap]

I'm going out of my mind

Indigo rolled her eyes. As usual, she was being her typical drama-queen self. Everything was going to be fine. She just needed to talk to Stellar. She'd explain everything to thing, it would be fine. And no, she wouldn't be going against anything with her and Ash. She wasn't going to Stellar to rekindle any feelings with him. For... closure, as they'd say. But then... why did she have the guilty feeling gnawing at the pit of her stomach? And why was she already completely sure that no matter what she was telling herself, she wasn't going to tell Ash about seeing Stellar.

But that was nonsense, complete nonsense!Of course she'd tell him. And he'd be fine with it. Indigo knew he would, and she wasn't just telling herself that. Ash would understand if she'd wanted to see Stellar. She had fix things between them - hopefully, they could still be friends. How incredibly naive. But even knowing that Ash would be fine with it, Indigo still knew she wasn't going to tell him. Ugh! Why! She frowned. Maybe because even if Ash didn't have a problem with it, she did. Regardless of what she was telling herself, she wanted to see Stellar again because she missed him.

He'd been her first friend out here and she'd fallen for him. It had been a mutual crush and it could have - should have? - progressed to more. Then she had randomly met Ash and for no reason plunged into a vortex of depression which he had rescued her from, albeit a bit startled. Then she'd fed herself all that crap about him having gone through with her what no one else had... him knowing her better then anyone else... just so she had have her intoxicating romance. The truth of the matter was that Indigo had over-dramatized the meeting in the woods far too much. It had become too important to her when really all it was was a moment of depression at night - everybody had them. Just because Ash had comforted her it didn't make him her prince.

But what about the other stuff? What about him telling her he loved her? Trying to save her from trying to kill herself? Ash did love her now and her whirlwind romance was playing out into a happy ending. So she should have been happy. But instead, she was just... confused. She sighed. Maybe a random chat with a stranger would be just what she needed to get her head on straight - a dose of reality. Something that this ill-tempered tom was probably not in the mood to deliver. So close...

Indigo blinked, a frown working its way onto his face. He was... sorry? Just like that? He looked so shocked... What had she done? Had something she said triggered this? She hadn't meant. Bewildered, Indigo's snappy facade dropped. "No- no problem," she managed, her tone evidently showing how confused she was. Was she missing something here? What was happening? Had he had a sudden change of heart? Did she remind him of someone? Ooh, she thought wickedly, maybe he had a long-lost love who looked just like her and now was startled into... Stop, she warned herself. Her dramatic side was taking things a bit too far out of hand.

But his next comment surprised Indigo more and she could feel her brow furrowing with confusion. "Excuse me?" she blinked and gave a nervous little laugh. "How did I know what?" What had she said? Oh my god - maybe the reminding-him-of-someone theory was true and... No. She'd only thought that to herself, there's no way he could have known... Unless he could read minds! Oh my god, that was it, wasn't it? He could read cats' minds! But now he could obviously tell that she'd figured out his secret and he'd want to know how she knew that or... maybe he'd kill her so she couldn't tell anyone else!

STOP. This was getting way out of hand, her imagination was more vivacious today than she'd realized. He was NOT a mind-reader. That was impossible. Besides, if he did read minds he wouldn't have asked how I knew - whatever - he would have known so he's obviously not, she justified with a small grin. Though the idea of it being 'impossible' was the more obvious reason for him not being a mind-reader, there were other explanations too. Seriously though, she was being over-imaginative even for her. And that was bad. Hmm. Maybe there'd been some weird spice in the food she'd scavenged last night. She shrugged.

[wolf]

Just off the key of r e a s o n

Wolf took a long, deep breath. He inhaled until it hurt to inhale any more, and then exhaled very, very slowly. He was overreacting. There was no reason behind his sudden outburst. He quickly tried to re-obtain his early composure, realizing already that it was too late. This orange tabby she-cat probably already thought he was insane. That he should pack his bags and make his way to an asylum. There, he thought, he would gladly be admitted into the wing that dealt with psychotic patients who ought to have gotten some therapy before they allowed their minds to get to this state, but they had been too proud. Too proud to go see someone who could help them, talk to someone. Yeah, that was exactly what this she-cat thought of him.

His assumption of her idea of him was greatly reinforced when she started speaking. She sounded confused by him, and frankly, Wolf was confused by himself, too. Jumping to such terrifying conclusions so quickly about himself; What was his problem? He was starting to believe that he may in deed require the services of an asylum. Was he going out of his mind? Suffering from loss issues for so long and refusing to cope with them that it was affecting his mental health more than it should? He took another deep breath. ’Slow down,’ He told himself with a firm voice inside his head.

He should probably try to find an answer to her question now, right? Try to restore his previous dignity that had been thrown into oblivion by his careless acts of insanity? Then he realized… Insanity rhymed with asylum. Well, it sounded alike anyway. Oh God, he really was losing his mind. Thinking about how things rhymed when he should be speaking! Just randomly, out of the blue! Perhaps the she-cat was right. His previous notion of requiring an asylum was further solidified. Did they even have cat asylums for troubled felines?

”Ah… Nothing. It was nothing," Wolf said unconvincingly. Yeah right. He wished he could believe that himself. He sighed, and said very quietly, yet angrily, not at the orange tabby but at himself, the brown, crazy, out-of-his-mind tabby, ”Sorry.” Geez, he was apologizing to this cat too much. Why should he apologize? It’s not like he did anything wrong… It was her that was driving him insane… Rather literally. He closed his eyes for a few seconds while he tried to get himself together again. He needed to calm down and get a hold over himself.

First thing’s first. He was not going to an asylum. Next thing. This cat doesn’t know anything about him. Third. It was just his imagination that had imagined everything about the boxes and his mental state and things of that nature. Perfect. He was back to himself before he had temporarily lost his grip on reality. ”What are you doing here again?" He asked in a less snappy tone from before, but still not so nicely. ’And now’ He thought, laughing quietly, ’She thinks I’m having mood swings.’

ooc: Rofl... this is really amusing. XD

Lyrics: Hum Hallelujah by Fall Out Boy

[Indigo Wintertrap]

So hold me
Let me forget

Maybe she could send a message to Stellar somehow. Maybe she could ask around for him? Her stomach was doing guilty, nervous flip-flops at the idea but her heart soared at the possibility of seeing him. Which she knew it should not have been doing. She was Ash's mate in everything but last name. So it wasn't completely official but that didn't make it meaningless. She'd told him she'd be with him soon and now she was running off to an ex-lover? She winced. No, that wasn't the best way to put it. She wasn't "running off" and Stellar wasn't an "ex-lover". She was making amends with an old friend. And old friend who she'd wrongly hurt and led on. It was the only right thing to do!

So then why did she feel so guilty? And why did she feel that if she did see Stellar she wouldn't tell Ash - even lie about it to him if he asked? She'd put Ash through so much... But he hated lies... Ugh! Indigo shook her head as if to get rid of a fly, thoroughly frustrated with the circles she was spinning in her mind. Stomping her way angrily down closer to the river she let out a sigh and focused her attention back on the tabby tom in front of her. The tom that looks almost exactly like Stellar. Expect for the eyes. And the unpleasant attitude, she thought chidingly before rolling her eyes at how judgmental she could be. Silly her.

"Nothing?" She arched one brow, biting her tongue to keep from saying that it hadn't seemed like nothing. "I see," she murmured knowingly, smirking slightly at her oh-so-wise tone which she was altogether certain this tom wouldn't enjoy. Say, what was his name? She frowned. Oh, once upon a time she'd wanted nothing more then a chance meeting with no expectations... But look how that had turned out! Indigo shivered. "What's your name, tom?" she asked, narrowing her eyes slightly as they roamed over his body. He didn't look all that much like Stellar, really. Just both brown tabbies. Nothing big.

"I said, not a problem," Indigo hissed, unsure of why she wasn't getting upset with this tom for apologizing to her. She didn't really care if he wanted to say sorry but he was just so unpredictable! Angry one moment and apologizing to her the next! It made him almost impossible to read and completely impossible to predict, two things that Indigo rather enjoyed doing. The end result was an Indigo with no clue of how the stranger was going to react and feeling rather robbed of a good time and angry that he could be so infuriatingly unexpected. Her eyes narrowed into almost slits, widening in surprised as he spoke again, this time snapping at her.

"What is your problem?" she asked, jumping up to her feet in anger. She hadn't even heard the question. "Do you just like being annoying? Are you so afraid of someone getting to know you even a tiny bit that you have to change yourself every second? As soon as I start to formulate one idea about you you're off being the next character that springs to mind! You're angry, I get it, but then you're all sorry and I'm confused and now you're bloody snapping at me again. Just stop!" Indigo breathed in heavily, winded by her long rant. Her eyes remained on the cat in front of her and to her horror she realized she was shaking and feeling the prickles at the backs of her eyes that meant one thing.

Tears.

I hurt you

[wolf]

We got problems
We don’t know how to solve them.[/I]

His mind wandered off to another random thought. Sure, he had found this “town” where a lot of strays lived. And no surprise, either, because of all of the places that you could get food. He had found the dump, the woods, and this stream so far. Well, the stream wasn’t going to be giving him any food in the near future unless he figured out how to catch the fish that darted around in it. But, still, it shouldn’t be counted out. It was still a source of food, and thus deserved to be counted. There were probably other places that he hadn’t visited, but this list was substantial for now. He would have plenty of time to find out the other food sources in walking distance around here.

Anyways, that’s not the point. He wondered if, instead of hanging out around this one “town,” if he should move on and continue his search for Daisy? After all, he hadn’t seen or smelled her anywhere around here. Surely the town wasn’t so big that she hadn’t been to the places he’s been at yet? Surely they would have crossed paths by now if she had, indeed, found her way here? It was highly unlikely that she had managed to get here, but there was a chance, and…

Should he leave after he was sure that he had explored every nook and cranny of this place and felt positive that Daisy had never seen this place in her life? He pondered this new path that had just opened up to him. After all, he liked to travel; he never did feel comfortable staying in one place for an extended period of time. He always wanted to see new things and, perhaps not new faces, but saying good-bye to the ones he didn’t want to see again. And a chance to start over, perhaps? Maybe.

Wolf’s gold eyes narrowed at her tone which suggested that she knew that it hadn’t been just nothing. Well, he shouldn’t be so irritated over that; Everyone knew that when someone replied ‘nothing’ that it usually meant ‘something.’ If anything, it had been his own fault, which it had been. On two occasions. First for his remarkably stupid outburst, and secondly for just saying ‘nothing.’ Where was his head, today? He needed to stop letting his mind wander off and get focused on the conversation to try and prevent another silly outburst like the one that had happened earlier.

And now she wanted to know his name? Well, what could it hurt? Let’s see. She could just tell everyone that he was a weird crazy person who had some mental issues. Something along those lines. Well, if that happened, it would just give him another reason to leave this place, right? Considering these things, and his curiosity to know what this she-cat’s name was, he decided to answer her question. ”Wolf Sharpstone,” He said indifferently, and, not sure if she would give her own name in return, asked her, ”And yours?”

Why had he apologized in the first place if he knew he was going to get a response along these lines? It had just slipped out. More than once. He didn’t feel the need to apologize, but it was like a reaction or instinct that he couldn’t control. Oh well. He couldn’t take back words that he had said earlier, no matter how he wished he could. If he did have this power, he wouldn’t have said anything to this cat and instead have made her so frustrated at his silence that she just left him alone. Too late now.

She was yelling at him. He hadn’t been yelled at in a while by someone of his own species. He hadn’t seen someone of his own species for a while until a day ago. And before then, he couldn’t even hear what the other cats were saying with everyone talking at once in that prison that humans had constructed for cats. He assumed that it was where they kept all the strays they had captured. That had been too weak to escape. Too weak to defend their loved ones. Too weak to do anything.

Suddenly feeling extremely angry, not only at the orange she-cat but at himself, he jumped to his paws. Gold eyes blazing with his sudden anger, he started to talk. As was his way, he didn’t shout, but he spoke calmly, slowly, softly. Like a snake silently slithering across the ground towards you while you sleep, and sinking it’s poisoned-laced fangs into your soft flesh. ”You’re the one who came here and assumed that I would like some company. I’m not like you or your friends; I would rather be alone. And then after I expressed, in so many words, that I didn’t want your company, you go on talking and now you’re yelling at me. You should’ve left earlier if you didn’t want to be annoyed and frustrated or whatever. So, I guess that’s my ‘problem.’”

Everywhere we go
We got some skeletons that follow.

[/I][/right]

Lyrics: Broken Hearts Parade by Good Charlotte

[Indigo Wintertrap]

Just close your eyes
I promise
We'll end this night

Wolf. She resisted the urge to snort. He didn't look like a wolf at all to her. Didn't wolves have grey fur? Or maybe black or white... not brown. Or at least, they never did in the stories that her mother had told her and her brothers when they were kits. Which led her to believe to this day that the idea was a brown wolf existing was rather preposterous. Though, she realized, the fact that they hadn't been mentioned in the stories didn't mean that they didn't exist. Star had never said that they didn't exist. They just obviously weren't all that important if they weren't in the stories. Well, that was the conclusion that Indigo reached.

Which should have been a mirror reflection of her opinion of this "Wolf". He wasn't all that important. Just a random, bitter stray with a bad attitude that should have meant nothing to her except for maybe a chance to vent out some of her own anger by being spiteful to him. But she did care, and that's what was frustrating her. She was more than just annoyed by the fact that this cat was so unpredictable and angry, it bothered her and she was determined not to just be on her way. She'd been so confused and trying to figure everything out these past few days and here, in the midst of unpredictability, lay a clear route.

In this case, there was nothing confusing about yelling and screaming and getting frustrated. Here, she could do those things instead of biting her tongue and bottling up all her emotions while she sank into turmoil, having no clue how to deal with him. For once, something was clear: this cat bugged her. And there was no way in hell she was just going to walk off and leave a perfect ranting opportunity standing in the dust behind her. She narrowed her eyes before realizing that she still hadn't offered up her own name. She smirked. "Indigo." That was really all she felt like telling him but it was probably also enough. She hadn't exactly met a ton of other Indigos on the streets - none actually.

A rush of adrenaline fueled through her as he retaliated though she was annoyed to note that he wasn't screaming or yelling or even just sounding mad. What was with all this control? Hell she wanted to screw control, flush it out of her system and be done with the whole damn thing. "Yeah, god forbid I thought a cat wouldn't be oh so angry at the thought of talking with someone else," she yelled back. "Fine then! Go have fun off on your own flippity lonesome! I certainly don't give a damn if you'd rather stare at yourself in the water then carry on a conversation! Yeah, you don't want my company but then don't go all back and forth with being nice cause you're just screwing me up and you know it!" She let out a screech of frustration, unsheathing her claws and ripping into the ground at her feet with them.

"Maybe I did want to be frustrated! Or maybe I'm just sick and tired of being frustrated and confused with every bloody little thing and my life and thought, so stupidly that at least there's nothing "confusing" about some bitter guy that wants to be all alone. You act like you're such a mystery, like you're so much better than me and I'm not worth your time but really you're not worth my time! Why the hell I ever even wanted to go out of my way to be nice to someone who was obviously going to throw it right back in my freaking face is a mystery to me now and you're sure as hell not worth my time. So just go on being all mad and alone but you know what? It's a bloody act! Yeah sure you'd "rather be alone" but dammit maybe you just know that no one else would want around someone as freaking horrible as you so this way you look like you're "too cool" for them!"

She drew in a breath sharply, breathing heavily after all the screaming. She narrowed her eyes contemptuously at the tom. "There's enough going on in my life without you barging in and providing even more unpredictability when I don't need it!" The last five words came out yelled unintentionally and she fought for an instant to control herself and calm down before realizing that she'd given up on control. "But no, you'd never know that, would you? How could you know that because you never bothered to ask one fucking thing about me, did you? Not even a 'how are you' or a 'how's life been treating you' but dammit even those would have gotten you your answers. So just sit there all depressed and alone, yeah, don't ever even think that I might be just as bad off as you, if not worse!"

Her flanks were trembling and let out an angry snarl, an instantaneous reaction to the stress and anger she could feel coursing through her veins, burning through her body like a fire, ready to overwhelm and consume whatever the hell got in her way. But god, it felt so good to let i tout. To just yell and scream and throw a fit and unleash every single emotion that had been tormenting her for so long. And this stupid tabby would just have to bear the brunt of it because he was the foolish one who'd sparked it off in her - who'd pulled the pin from the grenade. "And now you can bloody well sit back and watch the explosion," Indigo muttered.

[wolf]

I’ll be stuck fixated on one star
When the world is crashing down.[/I]

So, her name was Indigo. Interesting. She certainly didn’t remind him of anything indigo… At all. Indigo, not the cat, the color, reminded him of the setting sun. When the fiery mass that slowly descended from the sky, the lazy blue color was replaced with warm hues of the color spectrum. Reds, oranges, yellows, pinks… And perhaps some indigo, on the fringes of the colors that streaked across the sky like splattered paint with nothing to control its direction. Every day, a different scene was painted, maybe some more yellow and less red, or a cloud covering part of the portrait. Unpredictable.

Whereas, this Indigo, the orange tabby cat one, reminded him… Of a fly buzzing around your head, filling your ears with complete buzzing brouhaha that meant nothing at all to you. Or, at least, most of the time. Other times, her words actually did mean something to him, however random they might have been; By chance. But then again, maybe he didn’t know her well enough to judge how well her name fit her? Maybe their was something indigo-ish about her that her parents had noticed and thus named her accordingly?

Wolf’s attention was snapped back to the female as she started screaming her head off at him. Well now, she definitely wasn’t an indigo. Indigo is supposed to be a soothing color. The cat seemed to be the opposite as she yelled at the top of her lungs at him. He wondered how long she planned to go on with her tyrant. She definitely now reminded him of an explosion. Not only did it hurt his ears from its boom, but it was messy and not in control of anything at all. Hmmm. So, perhaps, in some weird, twisted way, she did remind him of a sunset? After all, it did look like sort of an explosion. No… Sunset explosions were pretty and relaxing to watch. This cat was no Indigo.

He realized that the reason why she was screaming at him was probably not all his fault after he listened to some of the stuff she was saying, which proved rather difficult considering she was yelling it at such a volume that it was hard to understand. This was more about her problems than his ‘wrongdoing!’ And there he sat, just quietly watching as she yelled her head off, probably about to make his poor ears bleed. But he would not give her the satisfaction of him making his ears lie flat to his head. No way. He wasn’t going to just trample his pride like that.

When she was finally finished he stared quietly at her for a few moments, just to make sure she was finished. Coming to the conclusion that she probably didn’t have any energy left to scream like that again, he started talking. ”I hope you’ve finished taking out all of your anger and frustration on me,” He said calmly, and waited a moment before speaking again. ”And, I didn’t ask you how you’re doing or whatever it was that you suggested because I didn’t want to talk to you. And now, obviously, I see that you’re pretty screwed up and that you’re using me as a scapegoat instead of saying all of this stuff to the cats that actually deserve it,” He concluded, and waited to see the effect that his words had on the orange tabby. Indigo.

Of course, he could be completely wrong and she was just really screwed up to get that frustrated at him for doing… Whatever it was that she accused him of doing. But most cats weren’t like that, none of them would just completely lose it and go berserk like Indigo had. Not all of them were that crazy. And if his assumptions were wrong, then they were wrong and he could just go on with his day, knowing that the cat was just really insane and he just managed to provoke this tyrant. And she had thought that he was crazy.

Lyrics: 7 Minutes in heave (Atavan Halen) by Fall Out Boy

[Indigo Wintertrap]

Hold back your tears
This time

"What?" Indigo shrieked, shaking from the tips of her ears to her tail-tip. "What?" she repeated, not caring how loudly she was yelling. "How dare you," she hissed furiously. "How dare you make this all about everything else! Of course it couldn't have anything to do with you! No, let's blame it on every other frickin' thing in my life!" She narrowed her eyes at the tom. What a jerk. "Can you seriously not take responsibility for anything?" she asked, laughing disbelievingly at "Wolf". "I mean what do you think it says about yourself when you piss off some she-cat you don't even know and then just assume that she obviously has other problems!" She inhaled sharply, her eyes flashing angrily. She was trying to steady herself but it was proving to be nearly impossible. She'd just have to resign herself a yelling, something she was not altogether too upset about.

"You couldn't possibly be the problem!" she shrieked madly, her claws unsheathing and sheathing in the ground as she tore frantically at the grass underneath her. "No, it's all me! Me, me, me!" she screamed. "I'm the one that's messed up, obviously. Cause I was insane to even introduce myself to a psychopath like you!" Oh yes, he was most definitely a psychopath. Of course, Indigo had sort of forgotten why exactly she'd been mad at Wolf in the first place. She was now very mad at him for accusing her of using him like a "scapegoat" to vent out her rage on but why had she been so mad in the first place? She gave a noncommittal shrug. It wasn't important. She narrowed her eyes into two golden slits as she glared at Wolf, shaking as she fought to breathe again.

What a stupid idiot. What a foolish cat. How dare he say that about her? To pretend that all of whatever this was had nothing to do with him when it had everything to do with him! She wasn't just venting to him because the rest of her life was screwed up! She wasn't screwed up. "No cause trying to kill yourself definitely doesn't herald any mental issues," she muttered, not even caring if Wolf heard. "And talking to yourself, that's another great one, huh?" she challenged, lifting her head up as she spoke mockingly, not lessening her glare on the brown tabby tom. "So of course I'm screwed up, eh? Just some random basketcase that spills trouble wherever the hell she goes!" She shrieked the last part and then paused, panting for her breath.

Narrowing her eyes again, Indigo took two steps forward, her eyes tauntingly remaining on Wolf's face. So maybe he did have a point about her having problems. Maybe he did have a point about her screaming at him when really she wanted to scream at others in her life. But she would not admit that to him. Her pride - which was about the only thing she had left - would simply not allow her. "Of course I'm yelling at you cause I screwed things up with my best friend for no reason! Of course I'm yelling at you because my life is a mess and I tried to kill myself! Of course I could never yell at you simply for the fact that you...are a...complete," she heaved the words out. "Jerk!" She let out a maddened snarl, her eyes gleaming as she crept closer to the tom. Stupid idiot.

"Aaaargh!" Indigo gave a sudden cry of frustration, bunching her muscles swiftly before leaping at the tom. She wasn't aware of her paws leaving the ground or of reaching out with her legs to scratch him to pieces. She wasn't aware of laughing derisively as she kicked off from the ground, the world blurring around her as she leaped. She was thinking of another time she'd leaped recently - off the roof of the barn. She was thinking of falling through the air and then aware that, now, instead of falling she was flying. This jerk of a tom had annoyed her and she was not going to walk away. She was past reason she was past even a single sane thought. She was acting on instinct and instinctively she had leaped at the tom, welcoming the fight that was to come.

OOC: Indi's cracked! Haha sorry but I just love playing her when she's in one of her unstable moods lol ;] Poor Wolf. He really didn't do all that much wrong - he was even telling the truth about the scapegoat thing lol! This should be interesting anyways =D

[wolf]

I'm losing my mind
So I look at the time
The clock's tickin' and I'm going nowhere fast.

Oh God. What the hell had he gotten himself into? What had begun as a simple inconvenience in his day was now an ear-shattering problem. Even bigger than a problem. There wasn’t any words to describe it; The best way to put was that it was just a really, really bad problem. His ears throbbed as she once again went into a screaming fit. She was like a human two year old who was throwing a tantrum. Only ten times worse, because she wasn’t screaming about a missing toy or the ice cream she wanted or some nonsense like that. Because he could actually relate to the things she was saying.

Crazy, huh? A she-cat he had just met a few minutes ago and had pissed off was screaming her lungs out at him, and he could actually relate to the things she was screaming? He sighed at his misfortune. Couldn’t anyone else had come and found him here instead of this insane orange tabby? But no, instead she was screaming things at him that he wished he could forget about. Like being such a deep state of depression that he had tried to kill himself. Just like Indigo. And he had messed things up with his best friend. Just like Indigo.

So did that mean he was just as crazy as she was? Or even worse because he was actually listening to her problems like some therapist and relating them to his own? Ugh. Stupid cat. She was making him doubt himself again. What was with her? He should’ve foreseen this disaster of an encounter and left quickly before she could even say hello. To stop her from making him face his own problems… But at least he didn’t go around telling the world about his problems like this she-cat seemed fond of. He wouldn’t be surprised if people could hear her on the other side of Nenbrook.

Yes, you’re screwed up. Now could you just shut the fuck up before my ears start bleeding? The whole of Nenbrook can probably hear you screaming all your problems. Lucky them that they’re not in my position of having to figure out a way of making you shut up,” Wolf said calmly, unable to take this situation anymore. He really didn’t care what she did anymore, how she reacted to his words; He decided right then and there that he was leaving her here to do whatever. Maybe she would try and drown herself in the stream or something. Or screech at a tree until it burst into millions of splinters. Or perhaps go to these people who made her so messed up and fix things. Whatever. What she did didn’t matter to him.

”So, I think I’ll leave before you decide to do something rash,” He said, and stood up to leave, scanning the surroundings with gold eyes to try and find the best possible escape route. He didn’t want to get within three feet of the psychopath. Just when he decided on his escape path, she screamed a sort of battle cry at him and launched herself off of the ground, heading on a collision course with himself. ’Oh great,’ He thought and rolled his eyes as she came flying towards him. She looked like she wanted to murder him then tear him to itty bitty pieces and then burn those pieces. She would then take the ashes and throw them into a pit with lava at the bottom. But, Wolf imagined, she wouldn’t stop there. She would bring him back from the dead and kill him again to get her point across. Hmm. Didn’t sound too appealing to him.

So what was the tom to do? As much as he liked a fight every now and then, believe it or not, he did have a little bit of morals. He didn’t want to hurt this she-cat who was obviously out of her mind and attacking him just because she had some mental issues and couldn’t help herself. A tricky situation. He had to act fast though, because she was almost on him. Well, he could always use a few scars… Maybe let her rake her claws across him a few times? And then not give her the satisfaction of showing like he felt anything of all? This was certainly a good plan of action to him, as she was about to barrel him over in the next millisecond. There wasn’t really anything else he could do. So, he braced himself against the oncoming bullet of a cat as she made impact.

Ooc: And he’s supposed to save her and her kittens? XD

Lyrics: Tea Station in the Vestibule by Plaid Nature Music

[Indigo Wintertrap]

Let me run away
Unafraid

Indigo shivered slightly as a soft wind buffeted through her fur. She was tense, her muscles bunched and ready to dash or spring. Only her eyes moved, darting to and fro - flashing with anger. How had this happened? She'd been fine and then she'd gotten frustrated and now... Now she'd just exploded on Wolf. It scared her. But the not-so-sane part of her mind wasn't ready to just let go of all this anger. No, right now it coursed through every vein in her body and fueled her mind. "Screwed up," Indigo snorted, figuring that it was probably the biggest understatement of the year. She rose to her feet warily, stretching out as she arched her back with a little meow.

She lifted her chin up, glaring at Wolf. "Yes, you're obviously the one in the bad spot here," she snapped. "Not me, of course not me. It's always all about you, isn't it? God, I mean here we have some obviously problem-riddled she-cat who has obviously gone through hell this past while and you feel sorry for yourself because you have the great ordeal of having to get her to shut up!" Her voice rose with anger as she spoke until she was screaming the last words, not caring if she was deliberately feeding into his annoyances. Served him right the annoying, arrogant ass he was. She glared at him for good measure, her tail lashing back and forth with irritation - sweeping the grass fronds behind her.

Challengingly, Indigo took a step forward, eyes narrowing as they scanned Wolf. "Oh, so you're just going to walk away," she crowed with triumph. "Leave this bend of the river all to me cause you can't handle it!" She gave a mad giggle, scampering after Wolf. "Walking away, are we?" she hissed. "Yes, just leave the poor insane she-cat all by her lonesome. Get away so you can have a better time!" she shrieked. With an angry yowl, she flung herself at him, claws unsheathed as she hit him in a flurry of paws. Hissing, Indigo set up clawing the tom cat, fueled by the desire to cause him as much pain as she could.

But only her only claws were moving. As she fell to the ground, Indigo glanced up at the tom in shock. He hadn't lifted a paw against her. Her eyes narrowed. "What are you playing at?" she hissed with anger, leaping again. Once more she raked her claws over him but this time with less fervor. He wasn't doing anything though and she dropped down with a screech of frustration. "Are you a scratching post?" she shrieked. "Why. Won't. You. Fight. Me. Back!" she hissed, poking him in the ribs on each word. Her eyes flashed up to his face and she gave an angry yowl. "Why won't you fight me!" she shriek-sobbed, utterly confused.

She just wanted a fight, to roll in the dust, claws scrabbling. She wanted to take out her anger but how could she do that when he was being so unresponsive. "Am I just not worth your time?" she started to scream, but it came out more as a sob. Indigo was shaking violently and her legs seemed to collapse underneath her. She gazed up at Wolf from the ground. "What's wrong with me?" she whispered. "Why won't you fight me back?" She trembled. Suddenly she turned her head away from him, not wanting him to see the tears that were welling up in her eyes. He probably thought she was enough of a nutcase already. But it was hard not to cry - to not let all the emotions just spill over and be gone.

She was scared, Indigo realized. She'd lost Stellar and everything with Ash had been such a roller coaster so far. But instead of feeling proud that it was all behind her, she felt scared. Because after this, she didn't think she could honestly fool herself into thinking that it was all behind her. She gulped, licking her chest in a vain attempt to comfort herself - a small routine of normality that only helped her to cry harder, realizing how not normal she was behaving. "What's wrong with me?" she whispered, laying her head down on her paws, facing away from Wolf. If he was even still there. She was too afraid to look behind and check.

She wasn't quite sure what she wanted to see.

OOC: Haha I know! Lol well now she's calmed down and feeling horrible so maybe he can pity her and all and that plays into it later

[wolf]

They say quitters never win
We walk the plank on a sinking ship.

It took all of his self-control to not fight back. His instincts were screaming at him to sink his teeth into her, to rip her head off, to inflict as much damage as he could upon the orange she-cat who was attacking him. To fend her off and inflict some real pain on her, to get her away from him, to teach her a lesson… Whatever reason he could think of. Because the truth was, he wanted to rip her to pieces, just like she was doing to him. He wanted to satisfaction of her being in pain by his paw. She was so out of control and annoying that he just wanted to… To punch her!

He was glaring at her as she started yelling at him. Poking him in the ribs. When she did that, he really wanted to spite her in any physical way he could. It went against every fiber of his being as she treated him as, well, in her words, a scratching post. But he was almost through it, he couldn’t just blow it now. Not when victory was in sight. He could smell it, taste it, he could reach his paw out and touch victory--

And then she stopped her attack. Wolf waited to see if she would resume her onslaught again, but after she started sobbing he assumed that she was finished, and sat up. He backed away from her a bit, wondering if he should take this opportunity and just leave like he had been wanting to do from the beginning. He stared at the pitiful sight of her laying there, crying. Even if she was facing away from him, he could still tell, he could hear and see the movements in her body, and he knew she was crying.

Why did he feel sorry for her after all she had put him through? Well, he would probably feel sorry for anyone that looked as pitiful as Indigo did right now. Even after that cat had raked her claws down him. Speaking of his body, he was feeling the pain of those scratches now and winced, wondering how many she had given him and wondering if any of them were deep and bleeding too badly.

His ears went back as she watched her laying there, crying, sobbing, for only God knows what. How anyone could do such a one-eighty in their behavior was beyond him. He sighed as he continued to stare at her. What was he supposed to do now? He was in an uncomfortable position; Definitely not used to this situation. Was he supposed to comfort her? Yeah, fat chance of that happening. So, what? He was just going to walk away and leave her here to her misery? He couldn’t do that either. So his last option was to just sit there. Sit there and stare at her as she broke down. 'God damn it,' He thought, his gold eyes still on her. 'She didn't have to pull me down with her. What's happening to me?'

So he sat there and watched.

Lyrics: Don't You Know Who I Think I Am? by Fall Out Boy